Complaining has become popular sport these days, and far be it from me to discourage it. Really, what brings people together more easily than griping about the weather, the line at the grocery store, or that bad call from the game last night? Wouldn’t we all agree that it’s totally disgusting when the bathroom sponge gets a hair on it, or how irritating it is that the honey container gets all sticky? Not to mention the fact that traffic circles even exist. And don’t even get me started on how aggravating it is when dried quinoa gets stuck in the side of my wire colander. Jesus.
When lamenting the agony of getting our kid into the best preschool or the fact that the family SUV we have our eye on doesn’t come with built-in DVD players and mini-microwaves for popping popcorn, we might cheerfully shrug and offer up, “First world problems!” as an antidote to the level of obnoxiousness evident in these so-called problems. And they are, without a doubt, truly obnoxious.
But I think there may be one other category of “problem” that has First World Problems beat in terms of obnoxiousness. Toddler problems. How many of us have struggled to keep a straight face when our toddler is in hysterics because the surly cigarette-smoking teens on the bus stop bench failed to wave back at them? Don’t we all cluck sympathetically at the distraught preschooler whose day has been ruined because she forgot to draw you a picture at school that day? If you think your two-year-old’s problems are ridiculous, take heed: Hell hath no fury like a three-year-old inconvenienced by the unreasonable parentally-imposed limit of fruit snacks. I wrote last fall about my three-year-old daughter‘s plaintive wails because her fingers were “so small.” This is no joke, people. Toddlers take their problems seriously.
So today, First World Problems are taking on Toddler Problems in a degree of obnoxiousness match. So decide for yourselves: which side wins?
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I never thought I’d say this, but I am glad that we are past the toddler stage, but still the pre-school age is only a step above with their problems, such as not getting a second helping of chese doodles, but I digress 😉
Hilarious because it’s true… My three year old recently pitched a fit because the pillow she identified as “not special to me” was on her bed. She continued to go berserk after she’d flung it to the floor. Also- that quinoa in the strainer? So annoying.
So funny, Stephanie! I nodded a lot since I’m not witnesses this stage for the fourth time.
“The granola bar broke in half” – YES! You win the internet with this one, my friend! Love it!
Ah… HILARIOUS!!! And so true!! I remember those days… sigh.
haha. So true. Brilliant!
OMG. Yes to all! My toddler just turned 4 so she’s not a toddler anymore, right? None of this anymore, right? LMAO
Too funny! Gotta say my kind brain has shut down all of those horrific, I mean happy, memories. But then I read this. And that evening when my sister-in-law (who was staying over night) kindly sliced up my daughter’s cooked spaghetti (that I’d carefully topped with just the right amount of sauce and hardly any bits of the “horrid” meat, thank you very much) came rushing back … You’d have thought she’d murdered her best friend.
FWP: My sister-in-law had to eat my spaghetti
TP: There were suddenly worms for dinner
Had to laugh out loud at the hair in the bra thing. I long ago wrote about that because it was awful and now? Not an issue!! Thanks for the awesome toddler reminders!
I’ve often thought about comparisons like this and loved finding this! Very funny and very true.
And DOWN WITH UTENSILS!