I think we can all agree that kids are professionals at messing sh*t up. Like the holidays. The expectation–> disappointment loop is stroooong at Christmastime. And I don’t even mean for the kids: I mean for myself. I have such high hopes of sharing all my most treasured childhood nostalgia with them: caroling, going to Christmas Eve service, baking cookies for Santa, the works. And how often do they respond the way I want them to? I think you know the answer. This year, December 23rd found me baking sugar cookies from scratch by myself and decorating them in the kitchen alone with my mom, after the kids lost interest after decorating 5.5 cookies apiece. (Although, let’s be honest. It was nice not to have 4 dozen cookies that look like Rudolph pooped all over them. My five-year-old has a tendency to hold the sprinkle container upside down over her cookie until it reaches volcanic proportions. And nobody wants to eat that crap.)
But this year, even Christmas morning was fraught with epic disappointment—first my kindergartener’s, and then, by default, mine. Let me take you on a journey.
First, let’s set the stage. My husband and I decided that instead of spending too much money on dozens of stupid, useless, plastic toys for the kids, we would get them a gigantic dollhouse from Costco to share, along with two other gifts apiece. We knew the kids would love to use the dollhouse for their epic “Lil Woodzeez” adventures. They seriously love playing with those together. It’s awesome. We were so excited to see their reaction. (You can see where I’m going with this can’t you?)
So. Christmas morning. Everybody was feeling festive and joyful. The kids were dying to open their mysterious ginormous package from Mommy and Daddy.
The anticipatory hug. These kids are excited AF.
Waiting delightedly for Daddy to put the present on the floor.
Here we go! How magically exciting! What could it be?
Still smiling! Ooh, this is gonna be great!
Her sister figures it out, and is filled with glee.
Kid #2 is still blissfully in the dark.
Now she’s caught on. Huh.
Well, then. Not so much.
A whispered conversation ensues. Disappointed Child pulls Mommy aside, cups her ear, and says, “Can I talk to you? This just really wasn’t what I was expecting.”
She just can’t even. Flopping atop Daddy with despair is literally all she can muster.
Her morning is ruined.
But people, this is a badass dollhouse. Look at it.
“She’ll be more excited when it’s assembled,” my husband assures me. “It’s meaningless in the box.” “Mmmhmmm,” I say without optimism.
After all, it’s this kid I’m talking about.
The Morning After. Kid #1 arranges all the “Lil Woodzeez”and furniture in the dollhouse.
Kid #2 makes a shitty blanket fort in her room.
I rest my case. But hey, at least she plays with the giant box it came in. Womp, womp . . .
Come laugh and cry with me about more cringe-worthy moments in parenthood on Facebook.
Yeah, we had some of the same reactions when my kids, 15 and 9 saw that the total number of gifts had declined from years before….they didn’t get the fact that more money was spent by Ssssanta on those few gifts than ever before…..I was thrilled with a new Barbie and some chocolate… Not the kids these days. I feel your pain…from one Stephanie to another.
Can you remember an event when, as a child, you received something that was less than exciting to you? How did you act?
Your mom and I are from a generation that would’ve carefully hid our true thoughts/feelings because we didn’t want to hurt the giver’s feelings. Now the kids are honest.
Perhaps your generation served as a “bridge?”
So I’ve thought about this a lot, and I think that even Izzy would have reacted differently (masking disappointment) because she would have been tuned in to others’ feelings. Even at age five. Sophie just doesn’t have that ability, which is fine. I want them to walk a fine line between being polite and thoughtful and not caring too much about protecting other people’s feelings at their own expense. It’s a tough one…
It must be SO difficult to rear polite, truth-telling, civil, well-spoken, well-read children in this day of complete lack of civility from some of our “examples.”
Considering you’re anonymously being condescending and passive aggressive, it’s pretty rich to be looking down on someone from the generation you’re blaming for lack of civility.
BTW, this was an excellent piece, as usual!
I didn’t get my kids anything for Christmas this year. We delivered presents to low income housing residents on Christmas Eve with the fire department I volunteer at. They can’t be disappointed if they have no expectations.
Lol I loved this!
oh gosh, this made me laugh. I love how you photographed the whole journey. She may have been disappointed on Christmas Day, but you will you cry laughing at the photos a decade or two from now 🙂 And yes, that is a badass dolls house.