Welcome back to Finish the Sentence Friday! I am happy to be hosting this weekly blog hop, along with these fantastic ladies:

Janine from Janine’s Confessions of a Mommyaholic

Kate from Can I Get Another Bottle of Whine?

Dawn from Dawn’s Disaster

Each week we will provide you with a sentence to finish; bloggers, link up below this post, and non-bloggers, feel free to join the fun in the comment section by leaving your finished sentence.

Now for Some Rules:

  • Please Make Sure to Follow Your Hosts, If You Haven’t Already.
  • Make Sure to Read and Comment on the Two Posts That Come Before Yours.
  • Share Your Favorites on Facebook and/or Twitter Using the Hashtag #FTSF.
  • Now Make Sure to Link Up Your Posts with This Week’s Prompt Below.
  • Enjoy and Have Fun!!

Today’s sentence is, “When it comes to reality TV, I…”

Next week’s sentence will be, “The most memorable Valentine’s Day I ever had was….” 

When it comes to reality TV shows, I am embarrassed to say that sometimes they are the only type of TV show I can keep up with. My husband and I end each day with a snuggle on the couch and together we watch one of the few adult TV programs we indulge in. This is the unfortunate epidemic I have noticed lately:

Whenever I am watching a regular TV show, let’s say, The Mentalist, (one of my favorite shows; I wish Simon Baker was my next door neighbor in real life.) I find that my thoughts have started drifting and I can no longer comprehend what’s happening. A mere 8 minutes into the program, I’ll jerk to attention, flushing with the realization that I already have no idea what’s going on. This sort of thing happened to me all the time when I was a kid; I would find myself in the middle of a math lesson completely lost, as my constant internal preoccupation had taken my thoughts elsewhere. Then- BAM- it would slam into me that I had no clue what was happening and I would panic. (At least I don’t panic when watching TV. It is mildly embarrassing though.)

Instead of following along with the riveting dialogue and pretty-much-spells-it-out-for-you plot developments, I have been daydreaming about how many more days until my weekend getaway, mentally writing a grocery list that I have no hope of remembering, or trying to figure out how many consecutive hours of sleep I got last night. And I am pretty much doomed when it comes to following along with the rest of the episode; I haven’t the vaguest idea which characters are which, why that guy is a suspect, which blond lady is the victim’s daughter and which one is the D.A. and so on and so forth. It’s not that complicated of a show, and yet I appear to be a complete dumbass who couldn’t summarize the events if you paid me.

I could ask my husband, but he has already fallen asleep on the couch next to me, and is loudly snoring, further interfering with my ability to discern the plot.

Now here is what happens when we watch, let’s say, The Bachelor. (Because yes, we watch it.) Nobody falls asleep, nobody is confused as to which over-mascara’d, big-haired, crying, intoxicated, unintelligent contestant is which. (I mean no real offense here. I’m sure at least one of those girls isn’t an idiot.) We know exactly who scored the one-on-one date last week and there is no question which girl is the obnoxious shoulder-tapper from the cocktail party. We are, in a word, transfixed. There is no mental list-making, meandering thoughts, or confusion about what has just happened.

I am chagrined by this perplexing occurrence. I really have no idea why this happens to me; it can’t be “Mommy Brain” because my thoughts wandered as a kid. It can’t be sleep deprivation, because we are finally sleeping through the night. Is it just my particular personality type? Am I losing brain cells as I age? I guess when it comes down to it, at the end of the day when I collapse onto the couch after a long day of parenthood, I just don’t have any mental resources left to help me navigate complex crime dramas or intricate character relationships. It seems that the worse the TV show is, the more likely it is that I will pay attention to it.

I can only imagine how bad TV shows will be when my girls are adults. Can you even fathom the endless possibilities for untapped reality TV show premises? My six year old has already proven her extreme fondness for watching TV. She is allowed a few shows a day, and her favorites are physically painful to watch. As if I wasn’t already convinced, check out her latest homework assignment on “Needs vs. Wants.”

The instructions are to color "Needs" red and "Wants" blue. Looks like someone had to backtrack on TV.

Apparently someone is a bit too reliant on the television…see her half-assed attempt to “fix” her mistake?

To be fair, I watch reality TV in extremely small doses. A little bit goes a long way. In fact, I am relatively disgusted by the number of reality programs available to us on cable TV. Remember when we were kids? (OK, when was a kid. I’m talking about the early 80s here, the pre-90210 era.) There were like four channels. And during the middle of the night there were those funny colored bars on the screen, certainly not reruns of Who Wants To Be A Millionaire? or a marathon of Cake Boss. (What the hell is that show anyway? I’m certain there are a handful of people reading this that can attest to its greatness.)

Fortunately, I do not have enough hours in the day to indulge in more than one (okay, maybe two) of these idiotic time-wasting reality shows per season. (I already admitted to spending all my time blogging, commenting, and tweeting here, so don’t think I’m being holier-than-thou with my time management skills and family values.) I  am overwhelmed at the host of inane programs out there that have no business being called TV shows. Seriously, were those days of 4 channels and 12 hours a day of programming so bad? Sure, there were plenty of mind-numbingly stupid TV shows to waste time on back then- they were called soap operas. Does anyone watch those anymore?

The year? 1990. Check out that old school TV with the big buttons! (Yes, we're watching Dirty Dancing.)

The year? 1990. Check out that old school TV with the big buttons! (Yes, we’re watching Dirty Dancing.)

For those who participated in last week’s Finish the Sentence Friday, you may recognize me and my friend Anne watching one of our favorite movies! And yes, those are a few of our Cabbage Patch Dolls with us. No, we were most certainly not too old to be playing with them.

Finish the Sentence Friday

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